doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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