Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
