eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
