i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize