dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I need moral support for this bender
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
He has the fingertips of a God
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
