Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
You are a genius and a whore.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
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