rhymes with "ouble enetration"
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
