Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
I'm at about main and main street
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Randomize
