question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
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