He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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