all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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