help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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