i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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