I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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