just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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