how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Randomize