Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
then he tried to convert me to islam
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Randomize
