We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
