we have officially mastered the walk of shame
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
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Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
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I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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