thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
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Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
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When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
i think i just lost a toe
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