Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize
