well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
