turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
