do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
