He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
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