lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Randomize
