You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
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