You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
