Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
