Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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