Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Randomize