I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
