drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
