i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
