i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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