Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Randomize
