Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
