Porn is love you can see.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
