she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.