this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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