Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Edward fifth and chaser hands
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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