I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Randomize
