yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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