talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
I am midnight drunk by noon
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Randomize