Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
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