ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
