i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
