Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Randomize
