If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize
