Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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