he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
