ADVERTISEMENT

• (650): View more from California

  i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug

  Fav 25 3497 974

  share tweet
  

• (559): View more from California

  That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!

  Fav 48 1831 3107

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (757): View more from Virginia

  apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick

  Fav 16 3166 948

  share tweet
  

• (901): View more from Tennessee

  i think i left my bra at your place

  (1-901): View more from Tennessee

  It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.

  Fav 22 11197 1438

  share tweet
  
• 

  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (216): View more from Ohio

  Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.

  Fav 10 3853 1229

  share tweet
  

• (571): View more from Virginia

  What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?

  Fav 26 3557 1334

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (423): View more from Tennessee

  just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party

  Fav 11 5720 1431

  share tweet
  

• (980): View more from North Carolina

  I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?

  Fav 11 1065 2600

  share tweet
  

• (310): View more from California

  Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship

  Fav 5 1856 781

  share tweet
  
• 

  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.

  Fav 2 575 900

  share tweet
  

• (315): View more from New York

  i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely

  Fav 3 892 762

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (941): View more from Florida

  do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?

  Fav 8 722 441

  share tweet
  

• (415): View more from California

  I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.

  Fav 3 64 16

  share tweet
  

• (973): View more from New Jersey

  I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night

  Fav 0 7 43

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (817): View more from Texas

  Hey do you remember me?

  (903): View more from Texas

  You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.

  Fav 0 36 3

  share tweet
  

Randomize