So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.