We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
